This is my personal perspective, that of a former dancer and as a Disabled woman representative of a regional Disability Arts Development Agency, which only has four dancers on its directory of over 100 artists.
I may offend you. I would ask you to bear with me and read what I have to say, as I believe we share more in common than you think. Some of what I say will challenge you, may even upset you, but please do not feel got at - but stay until I have finished.
My experience of dance is about pain, and failure and the constant banter of 'stretch, up higher, no that is not right, do it again,' even smacks with a bamboo rod! In no other art form do we get humiliated, prodded, bullied and physically manipulated to look 'right'.
Lets start with the bigger picture. In society today, Disabled & Deaf people are marginalized, from the moment we are born or the moment we acquire an impairment, our lives become segregated - we do not follow the common denominator in learning, communicating, visiting places, generally failing to fit into mainstream society. This is not our fault, yet we feel condemned to a life of second best. If we make a fuss, we have a 'chip on our shoulder', if we fail to make a fuss we are deemed 'heroic and brave' and said to be 'overcoming our disability'! We are expected to just get by and make do with what others think is best for us, be it in schooling, employment prospects (or should I say lack of employment prospects), even to if we should have children - and our focus today, in how we are allowed to participate in the arts, particularly dance.
We know all the reasons why we should not dance, yet something in us keeps on beating - wishing to express a gesture, a series of movements or an emotion that needs to be physically released - not analysed or stylised, but felt. I am passionate about dance. I did not come into it until after my first child was born - but I managed to train in the basics of tap, ballet, national, ballroom and modern. I worked hard, yet there was something always missing - me - I failed to respond when I should have - it is hard to lip-read when you are lying on your back! Yet I found, particularly through improvised movement that I could move freely and creatively. I then discovered the work of Rudolph Laban and found a language I could work with. I then went on to perform and develop in mime and sign dance, but always as a solo artist as I did not think I could fit in with other dancer's styles or gain acceptance for my access needs - it was easier to build up a protective wall.
I discovered Disability Arts nearly seven years ago - I found a place where the issues I am faced with daily could be openly expressed. An understanding that we are not the problem: that society 'disables us' by failing to take account of our needs. We do not need you to have nursing experience to work with us - but expect you to give us the control over our own lives by meeting our access requirements in order to participate. We do not want to be segregated according to our impairment group. This offends us and labels us. Disability etiquette is about asking the individual if their needs are in place in a way that dignifies us. To continue down the medical route is offensive - would you do that with any other sector of society?
Why are we never asked about dance? Why do you not facilitate dance workshops where participants are asked what they would like to do? Dance is usually imposed, ideas decided upon in advance. North West Disability Arts Forum (NWDAF), as a Disability Arts Development Agency, is usually approached towards the end of an application for funding, merely to get our approval. Or, funders may set conditions for funding, which usually means facilitators are forced to talk to us.
We need you to stop patronising our dance participation and examine the reasons you are working with us. Is it because you love dance, feel good to work with the 'less able', can not do the type of dance you want to or do you feel that is the only way your dance can be validated?
We wish to dance and be trained to dance. We are incredibly limited by the physical perfection that dance advocates, through the perfect body image, the toned and well lined body. Yet we have demonstrated through disability arts that we are capable of expressing dance in so many other different ways - we do not need to be limited, but through our diverse body movements or understanding we can physically express ourselves with grace, creativity and be attractive.
We continue to have major obstacles, the lack of real training opportunities - we may get to Further Education, but no further. If we undertake positive action training, such as the Workshop Leaders course or even gain apprenticeships, often the fact that we have not gained a traditional dance education prevents organisations from using us - we are not trusted, even to lead dance to other disabled groups. It is not our fault that dance education is so limiting. We are prevented from going further. Is that fair - are we supposed to make do with our lot?
We also have major issues with venues and accessible spaces - do not use it if we can not all go in!
One major concern is the lack of user-led disability dance groups. Other art forms are well represented, but dance tends to always be 'integrated' work. Therein lies the problem - we cannot be included - but integrated - the 'us and them' prevails in dance culture. The therapy experience is often all we are seen to benefit from - non-disabled dancers listen to us. How can you empower us with dance training or performing? How can we be more proactive with our contributions? If we are offended - will you stop treating us that way, or will you continue to see us as problematic or too political?
We have a long way to go in really listening to the others point of view - in sharing quality standards through to using accessible places. Are we important to you as people or are we an easy meal ticket?
In an abridged version of the words from US writer, John Fisher:
'Dance will not be tamed; it will not be contained, refusing to be confined to a one-off community workshop or occasional weekend retreat.
Dance does not follow schedules, programmes or agendas it does not even wait for order to allow it to flow.
The best dancing places are where the keepers of the dance refuse to let it go, smokey nightclubs or parties, places where dance is on the dancers' terms and inhibitions are allowed to fly out of the window.
So often the dance is kept to the clean, sweet-smelling stages of the 'keepers of the dance' where the floor is swept clean and the dance simulated, carefully choreographed to use steps that help them feel secure.
Sometimes, the keeper loses the plot; when there is pain or sense of loss of control.
Our dance is new and jerky, not always pleasing to the eye, but fresh on the lives of us human beings whose floors have not been cleaned up. Maybe not as well rehearsed as others would like, or polished or perfect, but slipping and sliding, the timing slightly off-beat, but innovative and shocking, at other times just exhilarant, but it's always real.
Most people, even those who pride themselves in their dancing, are afraid of this spontaneous and wild dancing. They are afraid of anything that cannot be controlled - yet it is most vulnerable, open to criticism - a quality to be feared. You see - dance must always look right.
We do not create predictable steps and prescribed routines and send all who wish to dance through regimented dance schools.'
No, we want dance in our own way, express our movements the way we want to, be allowed to speak for ourselves and present our lives, raw and heartfelt through the beauty of dancing differently, or is it not just dancing?
Ruth Gould, creative director, North West Disability Arts Forum. Email: ruth@nwdaf.co.uk